Updates from October, 2011
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sabah
12:18 am on October 15, 2011 |
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 Moria and I in front of Graceland  Elvis' living room  mirrors on the ceiling  Lots of fun woodwork in Elvis' furniture  Paiting of Elvis!  Elvis' costumes museum  Springfield show  My new Hallah Costume!!!!  Setting up for our Milwaukee show  Nice theater in Milwaukee  stretching before tech  Milwaukee show with Galatea  One of my best friends Rashel came to the Milwaukee show!
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 I’m exploring madness with my new solo in the show. My skirt is striped with strange fabrics hanging hither and thither. I didn’t know I was exploring madness. I just liked the song, “Frontier Psychiatry”. But I was dancing it and not quite getting to where I felt proud so I made Sabrina dance it for me. Watching her move while hearing my own music made me see the vision. She came out holding her head like she was hearing the voices herself. And that was it. I AM insane…the song is talking about me! And that story line now carries me through. As I find joy through the dance it’s joy of madness moving into itself and coming out happy. The dance of a thousand voices speaking all at once. It might also be a good time for this break through to have happened. We are just past the half way mark of tour and have about 13 shows left and about 2.5 weeks. The show is set and the costumes only require maintenance sewing, so things have begun to get a bit repetitious as far as getting on the bus each morning, driving 3-5 hours, getting to a foreign city and trying to find a restaurant and a Starbucks before tech rehearsal. Then getting ready for the show, performing, getting all the grit and glitter off, riding the bus to the hotel, bedding down for the night just to do it all again the next morning. So exploding with a little madness each night in my solo is a nice release for the pent up energy. Now is the time to focus and remember the joy of each day. We are also chasing fall, so that helps to keep the inspiration flowing while we drive. The leaves are golden, red, yellow and falling. So lovely. The weather has blessed us on this tour. Each day has been sunny and sweet with a slight breeze. The moon has been full and the nights calm. But in the end we only have each other to stare at, laugh at, talk to, and wrestle with. Problem is none of us have much in the way of new stuff to talk about, so we get really bored and then make each other say strange things, scream like a peacock, repeat each other in weird accents, throw plastic spiders and chocolate at each other…criminally insane. But we get each other, and that’s the important thing. Insane is only a bad thing when nobody gets you 
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A successful tour consist of routine, routine, and routine. Those of you that have intimate knowledge of me know that routine is one of my lessor strengths. I enjoy a heathy amount of chaos to my day. Perhaps this is one of the reasons I love living in Los Angeles. Everyday is full of adventure. Beside the basic; eat, sleep, dance I am always receiving wonderful surprises like new shows, auditions, and bookings. Add to that all the beautiful madness happening over at the Los Angles Bellydance Academy, I keep a full schedule being a renaissance woman. This means that each day there are incredible opportunities surprising me around every corner. I really never know what to expect and where my great adventure will take me next.
The opposite is true while touring with the BDSS. At the beginning of every tour we are given something that could or could not be occasionally refer to as the “book of lies”. The tour book gives us a day by day detailed description of performance city, venue, hotel, workshops and how many miles we will travel. And that it is. For the month or two that is all she wrote. I know what time I will have to eat. I know what time I will have to stretch. I know what time I will have to rehearse… Oh the monotony. So it is during my hair and make up time I like to get creative and us my spontaneous creative self. I have lots of fun thinking how my makeup will look each night. On this particular tour I tried my very best to limit my options of eye colors because in the past I have taken it way pass the LLLLLL limit. So each night I can choose from midnight blue, dark rose ( but that color broke so there just a small piece left ) sea foam green, and grey. Oh, I just remembered that I have brown but I have yet to utilize it. I used sea foam tonight so I will use brown just for fun tomorrow. I only brought one option for the lips RED. This decision turned out to be a lessoned learned. It is very boring to only have one color of lips to choice from night after night. I need a little pink in my life right about now.
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 I LOVE belly dance because it seems to be the one dance form that is inclusive of all types. I love this dance form because of how it brings out the best in those who’ve allowed themselves to indulge in the art, but most of all I LOVE belly dance because it loves me.
Before I discovered Belly dance I studied West African dance and music. After taking West African classes for two years I moved to San Francisco at 21 to study Dununba West African Dance after my beloved San Diego instructor Sharmain moved away from San Diego and I was unable to find her again or a replacement equal to her. Living in SF was great and studying dance at the City College there was the best decision I had ever made for myself, I’d finally broken away from a troubled family and decided to follow my dream to dance. Sadly 10 months after I moved to San Francisco my younger brother had fallen very ill and lapsed into a coma, I dropped everything and went back to SD to watch over him and my mother.
When I returned to SD I realized I could not make dance a priority, I just took classes when I could outside of my family’s needs. I also decided to get back into the classic styles I studied as a child due mainly to the unavailability of the styles I loved.
Whenever possible I went to countless auditions in Vegas and L.A. only to be told I was too tall for one show, too short for another, to muscular for the next, not muscular enough for the one after that, not thin enough, not curvy enough etc.etc.etc… over and over and over again.
It was very painful, and frustrating I felt cursed.
I believe no rejection feels as bad a artistic rejection, I swear it’s like having the very core of your soul torn out and fed to piranas, yes it made me stronger each time I’d face it and pretty soon It no longer hurt, but it was along journey to reach that point.
As time passed I felt less and less like I’d become a dancer, I felt like I was giving up.
I would cry nearly every time I saw a dancer on television, or in a show, I’d fill with envy and self pity every time I met a successful dancer and wonder where I went wrong. The rejection bullet hit hardest when being told at 24 that I was to old to join a touring dance company I had set my heart on, not only that they told me at the time that “at my age” I’d have a difficult time finding any dance company that would hire me. Their reason was because many women at 24+ cannot be depended upon long term in a dance company (long term meaning 5-10 years) and that it was that age and above that most women decide to get married, have kids and put their dreams aside to do what they are “supposed” to do first. I saw this as so cryptic, narrow minded and sad as a woman to think that this was the way it was known. Why couldn’t we do it?! there are worse and harder things we do as women with less reward I just did not understand and was frustrated at this. Oh how we hurt ourselves by putting our dreams aside ladies! But at the same time I had no other example to show me otherwise, I saw many dancers struggle, my mother one of them that in the end gave up her dream and lost everything including her life because of that decision, I decided that would NEVER be my fate so I pushed forward, I pushed forward for her and for all those that gave up their dream.
It’s true the path of a dancer is one of the most difficult of dreams to follow, even the successful dancers hardly make ends meet, but it’s still worth the journey in my eyes. It had also dawned on me that I saw even more women suffer for giving up their dreams for an insecure spouse or controlling parent, a “dependable” job, a degree that they would never use, or had children and gave up their dream because they felt they were supposed to rather than do both. I was furious at this box I was being placed in at 24. I wanted to show them it could be done I could be all those things and still live my dream, I could be a mother if I wanted to, have other options to make a living by, have a healthy relationship, and be a successful dancer and dance teacher. I knew it would be hard but I did not care, I had something to prove so I went for it full force started classes and put every extra cent and ounce of energy into it and then about a month or so later I injured my back in my Lyrical jazz class so badly that I could not walk and was told I needed surgery. I was so broken hearted, I thought it was over, my heart went black and hollow, I had nothing left after that and from that perspective I was not ever going to dance again…
After coming to terms with my back injury, no insurance, broke, sleeping on a friends floor, I began seeking other means of healing without surgery. I started taking yoga classes as soon as I could walk without a crutch and my right leg buckling from under me. Unfortunately dancing was not possible still but the passion for it was coming back to life within me as yoga steadily healed my spine. After a year or two, one evening I was out with friends and saw a beautiful belly dancer at a cafe that absolutely snapped me out of my grave of self pity, she was wonderful! She showed me a world in witch no matter who I was, whatever age, ethnic background, physicality, height, weight whatever went wrong previously, I was accepted as I am in this dance form, it was here that I could dance, find absolute beauty, endless creativity, I could entertain, I could express stories within me, I could make people happy, I could find myself again! This was heaven!!! So I kept digging within the art form and found the style that accepted me on an even deeper level. As I healed I added dance classes back into my life, belly dance became my new love over all other dance forms as each petal opened to me I healed and became more absorbed I was blissfully obsessed and pretty soon nothing could stop me, by back bothered me here and there but mostly when I was not dancing, I learned that this dance form kept me moving and healthy along with yoga I was healed.
Now 12 years later as a professional dancer I was also blessed to become a dance teacher, and I see my students find that same love, that courage and acceptance of themselves that they did not walk into the class with. Nothing is more rewarding to me as a dancer and teacher then to see a student discover this dance form and go from hiding in the back of the room, to leading an ATS group or creating a choreography, or even teaching her friends and family what she or he has learned. To see a transformation in a persons life that challenges them but also gives them absolute joy and a community of support from as early as the first class is not only a reminder of my own journey but also a reward and blessing to witness, to be a part of.
So, this is why I dance why I love Belly dance and why I always will. It heals me, it has healed me. A close friend of mine told me in the first year that belly dance would change my life in ways I could not possibly imagine, and oh how right she was.
I followed my heart I took so many leaps of faith that felt like total loss yet I made it through and am thankful for every moment that passes for where I am as a dancer. I will never forget the challenges I faced and continue to face as a dancer, I gave up and continue to give up many “usual” comforts for this, and could not imagine being any other way.
Following ones heart is the example of having true faith in oneself. I would tell anyone embarking on this wonderful adventure that it really is worth every tear and every fear to find your true passion and purpose in this life. Mine was to be a dancer and teach this dance, it has brought me more joy than I’d ever expected.
This is why I love and LIVE dance.
Photo above is of Olivia of Zafira dance Co. and I, Olivia is one of my great inspirations <3
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Today was our traveling day from Memphis to St. Louis. We had a little treat and visited the famous Graceland. We wondered around Elvis Presley’s mansion for at least an hour admiring all the little details. Each room was more elaborate than the next. The rooms each had a distinctive theme that all would inspire a new and a fun costume.
His living room would make a great cabaret costume. The room is ordained with crisp white carpet and white furniture. Bright blue curtains spice up the fresh white. And to top it off, red, yellow, and blue stained glass frames the door way, adding a shine factor. Two huge peacocks are inserted in the stained glass. Just imagine a full white skirt with a blue insert peaking out when the dancer spins. And a sequin bra and belt set made to replicate the gorgeous stained glass. The beading could give the illusion of peacocks, but in the red, blue and yellow color scheme, not the traditional peacock colors. It could be quite a classy look.
The pool room was covered head to toe with pleated paisley patterned carpet. It had a masculine feel mixed with the feminine softness of the fabric. The deep green of the pool table top was accentuated by the fabric walls and ceiling. More stained glass was used in the room’s main lighting fixture. A vintage tribal costume with some sparkle could be created. Maybe pants with a panel skirt made of paisley fabric could be the base. The belt and bra could incorporate the same fabric but pleated throughout the outfit with pieces of glass beads and stones to create a stained glass affect.
His den and hideaway area was the most graphic and 60’s inspired. The walls were painted with graphic shapes in blue and yellow. The bar contained bright yellow bar stools and table tops. The fire place was decorated with mirror from floor to ceiling. Also the entire ceiling was mirrored. TVs and records lined the room. And lastly it was accented with yellow carpet and a deep blue couch that wrapped around the entire room. This could inspire both cabaret and tribal costumes. The mirrors definitely could play into the beading and shine of the costume. A draping of silver reflective sequins could hang down one slit of the skirt and even weave into the lower half; giving the appearance of dripping broken mirror pieces. The graphic circular shapes and lines could be used to create an interesting sleeve.
The last inspiring room was his jungle room. Boy this one has almost everything. A custom water fall made of stone and plants. Fur chairs and couches with hand carved wood bases. Huge monkey, elephant, and tiger figurines. And plush green carpet. Quite a room. A rustic animal print skirt with a textured belt would be amazing. Especially if the skirt was for fitting with a slit down one leg. Feathers, stones, and touches of green could make a fun bra and belt set. A nice anklet could add some animal spice to it. Lastly a head piece, placed on the opposite side as the slit, made with an exotic flower, leaves, and animal print fabric would top it all off. A great tribal edge could be added as well. Large metallic pieces and tooth like pieces could enhance the roughness of the belt.
Graceland could make some amazing bellydance costumes. Thanks to the traveling involved with the Club Bellydance tour, now I have some great inspirations. Now off to St. Louis for our next show!
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sabah
12:48 am on October 8, 2011 |
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Videos:
Sabah Interviews Crescent Moon Dance Co in Louisville, KY
Interview after the Louisville Club Bellydance Show
 Stevo  Louisville Kentucky  back stage of Louisville Kentucky  With Crescent Moon Dance
 Club Bellydance Pittsburgh  Pittsburgh
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Moms on Tour
This week my mother joined us on tour and has scooched into the belly bus with us. Since there are only 5 of us on there, there’s plenty of room, but we still share a seat just to be close. It’s wonderful having a tour mom around. She tells you all the little things she sees from the audience, if you need more lipstick, what the lighting looks like, how a piece is emoting…all the bits you would pay attention to if you were watching yourself dance. This is in-valuable information as often it feels like we are dancing in a void. The audiences are always wonderful, and the high you get from the energy of the crowd is stellar, but the details aren’t spoken to you, so you always wonder; is this the right blush for me on stage? Is my hair too low, too high, too big, too blond? Moms can answer all of these things. And my mother is just perfect because not only was she a theatre major in college, she’s also extremely loving and positive so you never feel bad about anything she says. The first time she saw me perform with the Superstars 6 years ago she raced back stage to tell me, “Put darker lipstick on, you have no mouth!” Then at intermission, “Fill in your eyebrows, you have no eyebrows!” Next it was, “Put your bindi higher, you look like you have a unibrow!” She was right on all counts. Another time she told me to be more free, let loose and risk more in my dancing. She was right about that too. So I’m very happy to have her here now. She is such a fan of the show and of the whole project in general that I think she has run out of feed back as far as corrections go, so now she just holds the camera (the only one in the audience allowed to video) so that we can hook it up to the flat screen on the bus and watch ourselves large and in detail. The camera is brutally honest. Wow. Not as kind as the mommy filter. But it is so useful. If you want honest feedback, watch yourself dance on video. Geeeez. Sometimes you will surprise yourself with how good something looks, and then other times you just wince and think, “That will never happen again.” She has video taped the last three shows in a row so we are quickly making adjustments. I’m finding that I like for some sort of story to evolve through a performance. Straight dancing doesn’t hold the interest for me that it once did. I must see some kind of motivation on the dancers face or else I drift off into my own imagination. I’m struggling with that a bit now because my song is really strange. It’s all words and typically there are never any words in the songs that I dance too. What’s more is the words don’t follow much logic. There is talk of insanity, cowboys and midgets, the man with the golden eyeball, something about an optometrist, a violin, and a bird/parrot/record. So story doesn’t happen so much. But it is evolving and with mom and Sabah’s trusty camera, I think my solo and I might come to some sort of a regular working pattern soon.
Also she reads our palms, our natal charts, and tells us all about mythology and world conspiracy theories while we put our make-up and hair on before each show….I love my mom on tour
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Today was the 15th show, I have been enjoying this so much. I’ve been able to really talk to other dancers in each city and get to know many of them in ways I would not have during the whirlwind tours of the past. Each night is like a festival to me I really look forward to every show and connecting to dancers in more meaningful ways.
One of the questions many dancers have asked me is how do I stay healthy while touring, what is my “tour diet” well, actually… what I’ve had to figure out the hard way was (how to stay healthy while touring?). When I am at home it’s easy to follow my diet and heath pattern because I can just hop over to a farmers market anytime and am not exposed to public germ pits such as Airlines, public restrooms, hotel anything especially breakfast buffets, drastic temp and climate changes, lack of sleep, and the term coined on tour “The bus plague” when one of us gets the flu eventually we all do! So anyway after all the wrong ways of going about it I finally trusted my intuition and past health education and figured out how I could survive tour life.
Before now I would loose the battle by the end of the first week. And now I’ve had to create a diet high in fruits and veggies, avoid all meat or if no other option a can of Wild caught Salmon, adding full spectrum supplements (sea veggies, Bluegreen and or red alge) Whole food supplements, no alcohol and lots of organic juice and clean water, and reduce my coffee intake to 1 cup rather than 4, also doing my best to have the main meal before 5pm has done wonders for my energy and sleep patterns.
In previous tours I went about it much differently I used to have wine to ease a sore back, and the end of the show to relax, or for high stress levels, or (insert stupid excuse here) only to end up feeling horrible then next show, and then the next, and the next until I felt worse than ever. My skin looked like hell too, due to the alcohol, rough sleep patterns, high amounts of coffee, and one of the worse crimes to the skin (outside of smoking), I was not drinking enough water. Also, I rarely did any kind of daily workout outside of the show, sometimes I would get the momentum going but after a few nights of 4 hours of sleep, I’d loose it altogether only to end up getting the bus plague due to my taxed immune system and quit working out at all. I headed downhill fast and needed a month to recover after getting back home.
So now, napping whenever possible along with a wise diet plan, absolutely no alcohol, and forcing myself into the hotel gym for 40 min or more if alloted of cardio and or yoga, or if weather permits a healing run in a strange new city with a fellow dancer, drinking tons of juice and water and paying close attention to sore muscles I’ve managed to actually be healthier on tour than I am at home. This (healthier on tour) thing seemed quite impossible to me a few years ago, now I just feel lame for not doing it sooner. I really did know better, I needed to practice what I was preaching. My improved health has me inspired to keep this up when I am home and feel even better than I do now!
Finally on the right track, I am thankful that I am having the time of my life doing what I love and worked so hard to achieve. I’ve learned that if I am going to use my body to do what I love I have to love my body and treat it right, because our body really is our temple, How do you want your soul to feel in this life? I asked myself Why on earth would I want to cut doing what I love in this lifetime short by making bad/stupid choices?! So, I fixed it and it is paying off nearly right away.
I hope that this not only answers questions asked recently but also advises dancers with the same passion for dance and wanderlust as I.
Just try to think ahead for every action you take that involves your health, and ask yourself what it will cost you in the long run, if your dream is the price then JUST simply change your focus to what you could do now that would make you perform better tomorrow in every aspect? and “Just do it” haha  .
Deep down everyone of us knows how to feel good long term.
Effort is the toughest part of the reward, and the reward is always worth the effort!!
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Today we are on our way to Columbus Ohio which brings almost to the halfway point on this very first Club Bellydance tour. Everything is fantastic. Last night the ladies of Zafira in Pittsburg were off the charts. To say I enjoyed the show is an understatement. And bonus… They are totally fun as well. After the show they invited us out to a great place for food, drinks and some dancing. Zafira is the total bellydancing package; loving, talented, outrageous, and creative. Thank you ladies for sharing your awesomeness!
This week we have had the pleasure of two Whole Foods stops. This is the best thing ever. I need seaweed, avocados, rye crackers, sprouted grains of some kind and apple cider vinegar. I have been very active in trying to resolve my conflict with vinegar. It is no secret that this particular food product has been an enemy of mine for a very long time. The smell… Yuck! The taste… double yuck!! But the health benefits…. Magical. If you don’t know, I suggest you do some research. This potion has transformational qualities. Get with it to win it : ) That is free advice and you are welcome.
Okay so I heard from you beautiful people that you want juicy details. You want to know the seedy underbelly to the BDSS, because let us face it, it can’t all be rainbows and unicorns out here on the road. Well right now our bus driver is playing death metal on the speaker system in the BellyBus. Now, I have screamed forward things like; “come on you got to be kidding right?” ” really??? that sh*t is ridiculous” and ” real classy, Billy Bob, real classy”. He does not get my point or better yet is just ignoring me. But I have my headphones so Franky S can drown out that horrific sound pollution. And if my previous statement has ruffled your feathers, mullet and pentagram charm necklace please feel free to tell me all about it. So really it isn’t that bad, but I am just trying to complain a bit, stir the pot if you will. People seem to love drama as much as they love rainbows and unicorns.
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Two weeks into the tour and it has never once been short of a whirlwind. We have made our way through Canada and part of the US with a couple of bags, a massive amount of costumes, and glitter galore. This is my first driving tour with the Bellydance Superstars and I felt quite wide-eyed and anxious during the beginning of it all. However, over just these few weeks I’ve had so many wonderful  experiences. First of all, just having the chance to work with Sabah, Moria, Stefanya, and Sabrina is incomparable. These dancers are nothing short of professional, entertaining, and caring. Every single one of them has helped me with performance methods, musicality, and adapting to the road. Traveling and essentially living with them has also been entertaining to say the least. Our personalities fit together quite well and there is never a dull moment. The amount of tips and little tricks I have learned is ridiculous. Here are just a few. 1. How to put on fishnets in 15 seconds flat
2. How to grocery shop for nutrious after show snacks
3. How to make my hair so big that even Texans beauticians would consider it big
4. What dancing on a raised stage is like
5. The secrets of glitter application
6. How to make a continental breakfast into an almost gourmet meal
7. How to maneuver Bella criss cross bras during quick changes
8. What fall color trees look like…unfortunately Texas doesn’t really get these
9. How to dance on oddly shaped stages
and it has only been two weeks!
Sabrina introduced me to a great 3 am comforting snack. Hot chocolate mix made with coffee maker hot water and two packets of half and half. Each night, no matter how long we have been traveling nor how long we have been dancing, the hot choclate is amazing. Turning on the comedy channel and drinking hot chocolate is my little sleep time comfort.
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